Wedding Etiquette Questions Answered

While the whole process of getting married and hosting a celebration for family and friends is incredibly fun, many brides and grooms often get overwhelmed when it comes to the etiquette of weddings.  They run into situations that are unfamiliar and sticky- and often worry they'll offend someone or "do the wrong thing." Spencer Special Events is here to guide our couples through the process and put minds at ease. Today we are answering a few common etiquette questions in a variety of situations.

Engagement Etiquette: Who shares the news? At Spencer Special Events, we always tell our newly engaged clients to take some time to truly enjoy the engagement! Make sure you carve out time for each other and not let planning a wedding damper the joy you felt the moment you got engaged.  When it comes time to share the engagement, a newspaper announcement approximately two to three months before the wedding day can be made by the bride's parents or immediate family. Bride's parents should ask the grooms parents if they would also like a newspaper announcement sent to the newspaper in the grooms hometown.

What are the attendant responsibilities and duties: Asking someone to be a bridesmaid in your wedding is more than just having someone stand up with you and wear that darling dress that you choose!  There are some traditional roles that attendants play. Emily Post Wedding Etiquette provides a check list for bridesmaids, maids/matrons of honor, and groomsmen that include helping the bride select their attire, addressing invitations and place cards, attending prenuptial events, holding the grooms wedding ring, helping with the gown, holding the bouquet during the ceremony, standing in the receiving line, and more.  But don't you fret, Spencer Special Events always take some of these duties off their plate. We can coordinate addressing, carrying rings, touching up make up, and more since many of our brides want their bridesmaids to also feel like guests, and less like maids.

Do we need to have a receiving line? A receiving line is a traditional way for the bride, groom and their family to greet their guests directly after a ceremony or right before the reception.  This is a good idea if you are having a particularly large wedding and it will be unlikely that you are able to speak to everyone.  Or if you will not have an event prior to the wedding (example welcome reception) to visit with your guests.  If you have a receiving line, your order should be:  mother of the bride, father of the bride, mother of the groom, father of the groom, bride, groom, maid of honor, bridesmaids.  If you don't have a receiving line (which is less and less common these days- especially for a destination wedding), we recommend you make an effort to go around to each table and greet your guests, and say hello after you have eaten.  Because your family and friends have traveled a long way and incurred expenses to come celebrate you, it's important to make an effort to greet each guest during the night. But the beauty of a destination wedding weekend is you are privileged to spend more time with your guests throughout the weekend events!

Who gives a toast at the wedding? It's customary for the best man to be the only toast offered, but we recommend a welcome toast from the bride's parent's to all the guests, and a maid of honor toast is also acceptable.  Guests outside the wedding party should not toast.  All the guests should rise for the toast, except the bride and groom who stay seated.  If the groom toasts to the bride, she should remain seating according to traditional etiquette. 

We've only covered a few of the many wedding etiquette questions we get every year! There are always a lot of questions that we are happy to answer -- leave us a comment today and let us know how we can help!